From Cornell to King County

Survivors are everywhere.

They deserve better.

By now, most everyone has seen the national news about a lawsuit brought by a survivor of horrific abuse at Cornell University. Though we are 3,000 miles from that campus, we know sexual assault is pervasive, on college campuses and beyond.

KCSARC has supported survivors like Jane Doe every day since our founding in 1976, and much of what she experienced aligns with the experience of thousands of survivors we assist each year right here in King County.

We know that many victims delay reporting as they try to understand what happened and weigh whether it’s safe to report. That decision-making happens while a survivor is also working through trauma, shame and self-blame, particularly if alcohol or drugs facilitated the assault. It’s no surprise that an estimated three-fourths of all sexual assaults are never reported to law enforcement.

Chances are, you or someone you know is a survivor. Yet, the vast majority of sexual assaults don’t make news headlines or spark public outrage and calls for change. There’s no reason to wait for headlines in order to demand change. But how to go about it?

We always say we can’t change what we can’t talk about. Right now, we’re having a public conversation that largely centers on a specific situation. We hope it can be constructive and ongoing – this is a serious problem on college campuses and for this age group. But we also hope it opens the lens wider to ensure justice and healing for the survivor who is too afraid to report because doing so could cost them a job and income that supports their family. The survivor who needs to be understood by someone who speaks their language. The survivor who has been disbelieved due to misperceptions and false beliefs about race, ethnicity, gender identity, or sexual orientation, disabilities and more. We must continue — and normalize — the larger conversation in our schools and college campuses, at our kitchen tables, and with work colleagues, friends, neighbors and elected officials.

First, to survivors who are watching social media feeds and news headlines and feeling distressed: KCSARC is here for you. We want you to know you are not alone and healing is possible. Please reach out any time on our 24-hour Resource Line, 1.888.998.6423. There is free and confidential support waiting for you regardless of when your abuse happened or whether you ever choose to report.

To those who care for survivors: a supportive first response is vital to long-term healing. You can help.

Survivors often don’t realize right away that they have been assaulted. They may be in shock, or grappling with the truth that someone they trusted hurt them. Many cannot recall the assault in a linear way, and if drugs or alcohol were involved, piecing together a fragmented memory can take time.

If someone tells you about an experience that sounds like sexual assault, even if they don’t call it that, you can respond in a way that supports their healing. Our simple resource walks you through five steps: Believe, Affirm, Support, Empower and Refer, or BASER.

To our systems and community partners: sexual assault is about loss of agency and control, and restoring that power to a survivor is paramount. You can help.

Many survivors experience trauma reactions that may be puzzling or appear to undermine their credibility. Understanding that is critical to protecting them, holding offenders accountable, and reducing risk for others. Too many survivors are still met with questions about their motives, their behavior (especially around alcohol or drug use), their mental health, and more.

Sexual assault is a crime that typically has no witnesses beyond the victim and defendant(s); if a reporting victim cannot engage in their own case because of the added distress, there is little chance of successful prosecution.

For survivors who report to the justice system, a Title IX office or a school counselor, that entity must respond through a trauma-informed lens. Training responders on how trauma affects memory and behavior, connecting survivors with an advocate from first contact, and explaining each step so survivors can make informed choices are all things that could reduce distress from the start.

Those supporting survivors in the justice system must respect victims’ rights to dignity, to be informed, and to be heard, which appear in the federal Crime Victims’ Rights Act and in Washington’s constitution and statutes. If we expect survivors to participate in their own case, law enforcement, prosecutors and courts must uphold their rights with the same vigor as those of a defendant.

When we prioritize a supportive response, we facilitate recovery, improve the potential for accountability, and reduce the risk of further abuse. We also send an unmistakable message to the whole community, whether a school, a hiking club, or an entire city: abuse will not be tolerated here.

So let’s continue this conversation, and resolve to be vigilant, approachable responders who listen with empathy, prioritize survivors’ needs, champion and protect their rights, and connect them with resources.